Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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