Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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