as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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