Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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