is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
