no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize