garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I want you more than these girls want KFC
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize