So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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