she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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