WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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