okay pat passed out under dana's car
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
