i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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