butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Can I color on your dick again?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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