Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Randomize
