i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
