so explain again why im purple
no
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
