I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
