doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
