You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
