Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
