I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
