Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
