My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
then he tried to convert me to islam
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Randomize
