called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
