Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
They took my balls.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
