Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
