one two three fourrrrnication!
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
