I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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