I'm drive I can fine osifer
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
