If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Randomize
