she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
