took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
