So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
