operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
