If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
