For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
