It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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