i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
