Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I am puke
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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