i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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