kristin has been a bad kristin
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
