were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
