My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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