i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
