Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I got inside last night via doggy door
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
