Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
