so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
