I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Randomize
