do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Randomize
