i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
