She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
We left the knife in your bed.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Randomize
