Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
